Actress
Stella
Damasus might be having marital issues in her own home but that
doesn’t stop the beautiful screen goddess from advising her
followers on her Adiva blog.
Read her advice to women below: -
“…let me go to the topic I want to discuss today “keeping your
man” This is for the married women o please this is not targeted
at single girls. Now we know that the one thing men cannot live
without apart from money is s*x. In this forum I really don’t care
where anyone is from or what religion you belong to, I will be as
raw and honest as possible.
I do not understand why women especially Africans do not talk
about s*x when we know that it is the one thing we do regularly
with so much pleasure.
Keeping Your Man – By Stella Damasus
Hello ladies,
Been a while since you read from me and I am sorry about that.
However I never said I would be the only one writing for this blog. I
threw it open to members to send in their articles, concerns,
challenges, questions and other things to the Adiva email address
and we will publish it.
Not only that, we will get the experts/professionals to help answer
some of your questions, I am still waiting to hear from you all.
Anyway I have good news and that is the fact that you will be able
to watch me talk more/elaborate on things I will write in the blog.
Yes o my YouTube channel will be very very active soon with my new
project called Stella’s diaries.
You all need to look out for it because it will be very exciting as
usual. I will say it the way I see it and I am sure by now most of
you know I am not ashamed or afraid to speak my mind.
Anyway let me go to the topic I want to discuss today “keeping your
man”.This is for the married women o please this is not targeted at
single girls.Now we know that the one thing men cannot live without
apart from money is s*x. In this forum I really don’t care where
anyone is from or what religion you belong to, I will be as raw and
honest as possible.
I do not understand why women especially Africans do not talk about
s*x when we know that it is the one thing we do regularly with so
much pleasure.
Anyway our men love s*x to the max and we know that for a fact.
So how come when we are dating them we are so willing to give them
what they want even though we know it is wrong. The first few
years of marriage is filled with s*x almost five times a day in
different parts of the house and at odd hours, but after the few
years we start to back down, we start to make excuses, we start to
see it as a chore and then we let them know that we are really not
interested in them physically.
Wow, what happened to the lady fox, the hot chic, the sexy cat that
he got married to?
What happened to the babe that would understand the signal he
would give and immediately comply?
What happened those times when he would race home to his sexy
energetic ever ready wife who would make him feel wanted?
I know that most of you will say “I have kids who wear me out, I
have work that drains me, I got older, my s*x drive has gone under,
I have a headache” to the point that the man will need to get a visa
at your “embassy” to visit his favorite place in the World.
When you do this to him, how do you expect him to come home
everyday to look at your tired, grumpy and unfriendly face?
How would you expect him to come home to you complaining about the
plumber, your child that was being rude, and your boss that gave
you a hard time?
NOOOOOOO please.At that point he wants you to take him to that
special place were the sky is so wonderful and turn his brain around
to the point that all you say will sound like sweet music to his ears.
These men are human beings who go through their own challenges,
half of which you don’t even know because they are trying to save
you from all the stress.
What annoys me the most is when we women start to complain and
nag about the men not having time for us, and how they no longer
find us attractive anymore and that’s where the suspicion starts.
That’s when the saying comes, “if he is not getting it from me
someone else must be giving it to him’.I don’t encourage cheating at
all in fact it goes against what the bible teaches no matter what. I
will not also judge anyone who has been caught in a web he is not
proud of for one reason or the other. I believe that if we are truly
sorry for our sins and we go to God with the determination not to
sin again, he is merciful and will forgive us.
In all of this I know that all men are not beasts, neither are they
evil because we married them. I also know that men do not get
married and carry it at the back of their minds that they must
cheat. That’s not how it works please. There are things that we do
that trigger things in their brains and these things drive them to do
things that they really would not have done. Most of us believe it
when they say men don’t think with their brains but they think
with their man-hood. I beg to differ because they know what they
are doing and I don’t see how the man-hood can have a brain that
will control the whole body. There is always something that sparks
off in the brain that sends the signal to the man-hood.
You may or may not agree with me but this is what I choose to
believe. Most men we married are not so evil and dubious, some may
be cowards but cast your mind back to the kind of man you chose to
marry and see if there were traces of that character or not.
What men want:
- They want to feel like they are in control of things which is not
bad because they are the head.
- They want to feel loved and like it or not they are our first
babies who desire words of affirmation no matter how macho they
seem.
- They want to feel WANTED all the time, it gives them the
confidence that all men crave for.
- They want to know you are still sexually attracted to them.
- They don’t want you to make it obvious that you are smatter even
if you are.
- They like their space and alone time.
- They don’t want to come home to a fat mama who is the opposite
of the sexy curvy woman he fell in love with, because she let herself
go after they got married. Why should she try and look the same?
She is married now, who else does she have to impress? WRONG!
Men are first of all moved by what they see before anything else.
So when they can’t see that anymore or at least an effort to
getting back that body that turned them on, they’ll probably lose
interest in you and find it someone else.
- They don’t want to come and hug you after work with you are
smelling of onions and oil. At least take a shower before he gets
there or if there is no time spray perfume.
- They want to come home to a nice smelling neat and tidy home.
- They want to walk into the bedroom with the bed all made up and
clothes arranged. Maybe a small note on his pillow saying I love you
and I am glad you are home, that definitely puts an automatic smile
on his face even if for three seconds, it keeps him interested in you
- They want you to be a good listener not just a talker.
- They want to know that you believe in them and you are proud of
them.
- They want to know that no matter what you will have their back
and support them, then ask questions later.
- They just want to see that you are making an effort because no
human should expect you to be perfect.
- They don’t want another mother but they want you to take care
of them the way you would your kids.
- They want a wife, girlfriend, sorry to say (personal call girl) which
is not a bad thing because he is your husband who is free to express
his s*xual desires as long as they are not life threatening or
demeaning.
There are so many things I can add and you will not stop reading so
let me end this by saying: if you do not try to do at least 60
percent of this regularly, trust me a younger version of you will
cross his path and that is exactly how the enemy works. When that
younger and more energetic version of you catches his eye, your
matter will quietly end. This girl will rock his world so bad that
coming home to you will become a chore. These girls can give him all
these things and even more that the men find it so difficult to
resist. All the money that was supposed to go to you and your
children will find their way to her pocket. They can get anything
they want from your man because they know the secret to getting
and keeping him.
I know that this article will cause a lot of controversial wahala but
it is fine because in life people don’t like to hear the truth. This
might also be an opportunity for people to make silly comments but
the truth is I am loving it all. I finally have the attention of people
who will ordinarily not want to listen to me or watch me.
Ladies on a more serious note, if you are guilty of these crimes and
are depriving your husband of what is rightfully his then don’t be
shocked when a younger version of you gets the best of him.
I will let you all know when the extended version of this topic will be
on my YouTube channel. God will bless your homes and give you the
wisdom you need to keep it together.
Think about this objectively, try out what you agree with and
discard what you don’t. Leave the messenger out of it for a change
and see the bigger picture ahead.
Take care of yourselves and remember that I love you all.
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